


Fire in the Blood

by Monika_Blue



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/F, Final Fantasy XIV: Shadowbringers Spoilers, lots of feels, reader POV, this is all in the first person because I can't write
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-10-05 02:01:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20481047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Monika_Blue/pseuds/Monika_Blue
Summary: Light burns in a way Fire never could; deep down near Ondo Cups, you collapse...





	Fire in the Blood

Light burns in a way Fire never could; rather than the loud and passionate roar of flames, it is the silent and indifferent judgement, your body burning away in searing radiance. It hurts worse when you fight, when you push the Light down; it cuts and burns deeper and deeper but it will not change you, not yet. You’re not ready yet. 

The Light is inevitable, it knows and you know it does. It pushes against your bones and your flesh, exploring it’s new vessel as one would a new home; it will not wait forever, but given how your body is already changing in small ways, you both know that wait will end soon.

You came here to die. To throw your fading form against the Ascian that plagues your footsteps, to force him to put you down or burn in your radiance. This story’s ending had been written an age before, only a death lay at the end of this road; perhaps it would not be the Exarch, G’raha, but you yourself to fall… A poor ending but and ending all the same.

The scions had scattered in desperation, working tirelessly in your stead to earn the favour of the Ondo; you are given smaller tasks, you give them silent appreciation as another fit wracks your body. Out of sight, you crumple to your knees, coughing until your lungs bleed pallid white lifeblood. 

There is a hand at your back. A head pressed against your shoulder as someone sinks to their knees beside you; you can’t take the moment to look but you know her by the hesitant tenderness of her touch. It’s Alisaie. Even in your weakness you know the danger of being close, you weakly try to push her away but she holds fast, “Don’t you dare…” Her tart tone mired in sorrow, you can feel the rage simmering under the surface of her skin; it reminds you of the Light boiling under yours. 

If aether’s weakness could be found in expression, the withering glare Alisaie gives the expelled glowing lifeblood would cure you in an instant. Her eyes flicker from the blood splattered across the dry ocean floor, then back to you, it is hard to breathe still but the convulsions and coughing have stopped; strength returns to your limbs with an aching fanfare. Alisaie wipes some of the blood from your lips, her eyes meeting yours and you see pain mirrored, “Don’t hide this from us. From me.” She dips her Light-tainted hand in a pool of water still left, “You know how I abhor the heroic sacrifice, do not suffer in silence under the lie that it will protect me. It will not. We are in this together.” 

Together is a pretty word. A kind word. Her word. Ever since her moment of weakness upon the eve of that monumental battle; even across the Rift a year in the future, it is hers. There is a joy in it, together you are not alone. She, no longer aside from her peers; a hard headed woman of action in a city of those that would view it all from every angle before committing. You, no longer the lone hero; less a woman and more a weapon, the blade and shield on which any enemy of the Light would break against. Together you are more, together you are less; two blades of shadow to break the Light; two women desperate for salvation as one dies slowly and the other is powerless to stop it. You suffer together.

Alisaie’s voice drops low, “I was not there for you when you needed me most, I will not fail so again. Do,” Her voice breaks, like glass that shatters in the space between you, “Do you wish for it to be me?” You don’t need to ask her what she means, a lingering question on every Scion’s lips. You shake your head, you don’t want it to be any of them; the Light within will not be denied a host and if you, one supposedly blessed, cannot handle this weight, your friends and family could not either. She presses her head into yours, you feel the wetness of tears strike your knees as her shoulders shake; her hands grip onto yours like you will fade away in the space between heartbeats, “It isn’t fair.” She speaks between hard breaths. You let her cry, you let her hold on and immerse herself in what remains of you. 

“It took losing you once for my heart to understand what it felt.” Emotional vulnerability, words for you and you alone; your pulse has been weak since you collapsed, but her words quicken in your chest, her words keep your heart beating. “I do not think I could bear to lose you a second time, knowing this one is forever. That I walked beside you till the end and could do nothing.” Her hands bundle up in your clothes, “And here I am lamenting how I feel while you’re dying before my eyes.” The venom in her words hurts more than the Light remaining in your throat. You recall her speaking of her friend, you remember Tesleen… You are the next one in line for Alisaie to lose.

For once, your tired body doesn’t argue. You lift your hand to her cheek, running your thumb across the tears on her face.  
“Hey, Alisae...”  
Her tears pause, frozen in time as they are replaced by surprise. You lean in and press a kiss to her lips. When you pull away, her eyes are wide, what little you can see of her skin prickled up in goosebumps.  
“I love you.”  
She blinks once, twice… She mouths the words back to you, as if she is testing how they feel in her own throat. “I love you too.” The dam breaks. She kisses you this time; her kiss burns like the fire you feel under her skin. Her hands twist into your hair, pulling you closer as the flames threaten to consume you both. You might get caught but you no longer care about that. Alisaie doesn’t either.

Fire burns in a way Light never could, rather than the silent and indifferent judgement, it is the loud and passionate roar of flames; your heart burning away in searing calenture.

And that’s what it is, delirium… Madness, born of her heat, to believe you might make it out of this alive; but as her touch, painfully soft as if you will break under the weight of her sorrow, grazes across your flesh… Perhaps together, you can make truth of the madness, perhaps together, you can make a miracle.

Perhaps together, you both can take this story, this sorrowful ending, and make it happy. Make it yours.


End file.
